Thank you for all your prayers and support I have continued to receive while being here. It really means so much. I am trying to upload some pictures right now to share with you but African internet can be difficult sometimes so we'll see how it works. To view them, simply click on "Browse My Photos" on the left of the screne. You can see some of the children that have stolen my heart during these past 4 months.

It's amazing to see everyone on my team grow during our time here. We were all so shy in the beginning, not knowing what to do or how to live in this culture. Now we have all built relationships, found our ministry sites, and even learned a bit of the language. God has been good as he is growing each of our hearts. Sometimes slowly, sometimes painfully, but always faithfully.

I only have a couple more weeks here in Swaziland and then my team will be heading to South Africa for a little debrief before we head home. Please pray for us as our time here is drawing to a close. What I will be praying for is for hunger here in Swaziland. Not in a physical sense. That is already much to common. But in a spiritual sense. The people here know the gospel. They have heard it many times before, but they are not hungry for the God that loves them more than life. Please pray for God to awaken this people to his power and might.

There are times working here in Swaziland that I just look around and think, "This is really hard." I mean, the physical basic needs here are so much bigger than me and the people are so used to hearing the gospel people don't know true love of God that can make them a new creation. It's just hard.

This week I was reading n Matthew and came across the beatitudes. I have read them many times before but they took on new meaning as I read them again. They say,

"God blesses those who are poor and realize their need for him,
for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs.
God blesses those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
God blesses those who are humble,
for they will inherit the whole earth.
God blesses those who hunger and thirst for justice,
for they will be satisfied.
God blesses those who are merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
God blesses those whose hearts are pure,
for they will see God.
God blesses those who work for peace,
for they will be called the children of God.
God blesses those who are persecuted for doing right,
for the Kingdom of Heaven is theirs."

I realized that this being hard is part of being a Christian. It is part of a longing for God's kingdom to come and for sin to vanish. It is longing for his holiness to swallow up pain and death. I, along with the rest of creation, await that day in eager expectation. Until then I will strive to be a person that God blesses. A person who is leaning on him for every breath, running this race, proclaiming truth, loving his creation, and praising his perfect name.

I do have a prayer request. We have a Swazi girl named Treasure who is living with the team and goes to ministry with several of the girls to act as a translator. She is 19 and has become a dear friend. A couple weeks ago she became sick and had to have emergency surgery. She is doing much better now and we are so thankful we were able to take her to a nice clinic and love her as the child of God she is. However, now we have a large medical bill that her family would never be able to cover. We as the Church would like to pay it. With the surgery and medicine we are still about $1, 500 short. If you would like to give even a very small amount, please give a check to my parents who would then be able to pass it along to me. Thank you so much.

The Squatter Camp community that Kristin and I work in is called Magnwanini Manzini. It is a dark and wounded community. I Peter 5:8 says that the devil is prowling like a lion looking for someone to devour. Well, in Magnwanini, it looks like he is feasting. Alcoholism plagues almost every household. Deceit and jealousy are a way of life. The closest thing the men have to a job is going across the street to the dump and scavenging through the rubbish looking for something to eat. The women are largely prostitutes and the children are far from loved. Most kids go to the dump as well where many are raped, even killed for the chance to eat expired meat. One of the teachers at the carepoint told me she thinks that about 70% of children in that community are sexually abused. Others, including myself, think the number is much higher, and sexual abuse in this country pretty much grantees AIDS. Satan has a dark grip on this self named "forgotten community."

I don't share these details to make you squirm or to raise funds. I simply want to share the truth about the environment in which I go every day. I hold children, apply band-aids, stir pap and beans, kiss their heads, and pray. But many days I feel so helpless. I become filled with doubts and feel completely defeated. I feel like I can't stand in front of a group children who live in these circumstances and proclaim that God has the power to protect and provide. I feel inadequate to talk about the faithful God who stands for justice and loves the little children. I get so discouraged that sometimes I just want to call it quits.

Everyday I help dish the afternoon meal to about 100 children at the carepoint. For a couple days I noticed that we had only about half as many people coming so I asked a teacher what why she thought so few children where coming. She claimed that she didn't know but after a couple minutes she said in the wisdom and discernment I have come to respect and rely upon, "I think there is a dark cloud over this place. I think it is spiritual." That's when I realized that the doubts and defeat I had been filling my life where spiritual a spiritual attack as well. The lion, the devil, is still hungry and wants darkness to stay in that place. I was ignorant to think that he would allow us to bring in the light of the world without a battle.

I came home and repented for believing the lies of the enemy over the voice of my Father. I admitted to God that I couldn't stand up against the devil's lion like attacks by myself and asked for help. Then I went to Ephesians 6 and received the gift God had so mercifully given us - the armor of God. I know most of us have talked about the armor of God in a VBS or sunday school where children have gotten dressed up in plastic armor to take a picture to hang on the frig but now I needed God's help for real. I slowly looked at each piece and put on the armor in a real way. First I put on the belt of truth. I decided to hold onto a few key truths that were hard to believe in the face of such darkness. God is merciful and faithful. God has a plan. He is just and loving. I was resolved to not doubt things that I knew where true just because I didn't understand them in this context at this particular moment of time. Then the body armor of God's righteousness. I love how the thing that protects my heart is God's righteousness and not my own. I need to rely on his protection and his holiness. Next was shoes of peace that come from the Good News. There is peace in knowing that the battle is already over and victory is already won. I am not anxiously awaiting the outcome. When Jesus said, "It is finished," he wasn't lying. Then came the shield of faith. I looked at my faith and realized that if that was my shield then it had many holes in it. I repented and asked God for a new shield. that in his mercy he might strengthen my faith. Salvation has a helmet brought comfort as I realized that I am saved. I am safe. God has me in his might hand and will not let me go. The last piece is the sword of the Spirit which is the word of God. Praise him that he does not send us into the world empty handed. I don't have to hide and wait it to pass like a storm. I am a mighty warrior for his kingdom with his Spirit working through his Word.

This process was simple and didn't take a lot of time but made a world of difference. I have been rescued into the Kingdom of Light and I intend to live that way. Every day I enter into ministry I will be praying on the armor. I invite you to join me. See where you can stand strong in your life.

My ministry partner, Kristin Lampen, posted a great blog about the expectations we put on God and how so many times we actually expect too little of a glorious God that made the entire universe. To read it, check out her blog at kristinlampen.myadventures.org.

One of the things I love to do at the carepoint is help to cook. The cooks are all volunteers and work so hard. They love the support and have taught me a couple SiSwati words so they can tell me what to do in their own language. They all ask me if I will cook for my mother when I get home. I tell them yes because we don't have pap and beans in America. The trick will just be finding maze mill in the US.

One of the cooks really challenged my time here. She talked to me about how it's hard for her to make ends meet because her husband died and she has three children. She asked me to pay her children's school fees. She explained, "I pray every night that God would make you my angel. You are just one person here but it's like when the nation of Israel was in Egypt. God sent just one person: Moses. But Moses did not leave the people in Egypt, don't leave us here."

I stood in shock trying to grasp what she had just challenged me with. The need is so great and I'm leaving in May. I was overwhelmed and thought there is no way I can be her Moses. But then I realized, Moses didn't do that much. God did. I told her, "When the people of Israel were hungry, Moses didn't have anything to give them. He prayed and God gave them food. When the Israelites where thirsty, Moses didn't have anything to give them to drink. He prayed and God gave them water. I do not have the money to give you but I can pray and my God can provide." I realized this is a dangerous promise to make in the midst of such poverty but I do believe that God is powerful and merciful. If this cook trusted in God then he can provide. We prayed together and it was beautiful - both of us pouring our hearts out to God in complete dependence because neither one of us had the answer.

I realized that prayer is how Moses guided a nation. There were times that God was ready to wipe out the entire people group and then Moses prayed and God had mercy. There is so much tragedy and heartache that I can do nothing about. I simply much pray and beg for God's grace and power. Please join me as I pray for this community. Pray for Rosa, a five year old refugee from Mozambique who comes to us with scares on her back because of the beatings she receives at home. Pray for Skhumbuzo, a 7 year old boy who's dad is in prison for trying to kill his mother. Pray for Donelle, a 9 year old girl who is a prostitute to get food. Pray for Zenzi, a 5 year old girl who is HIV positive. Pray for Angel, a 8 year old girl who's parents have died so she along with all her cousins live with her grandmother where there is simply not enough to go around. Pray for Timbokosi, a 4 year old boy who is being sexually abused. Pray for Nobile, a 7 year old girl whose leg is badly hurt but her family cannot afford to go to the doctor. The list can go on. There is so much need here. I can do nothing but hold these children and pray.

The teacher at the carepoint, Treasure, was talking to me about the children and simply said, "Without Christ, there is no hope." I agree. I agree.

So the Lord must wait for you to come to him so he can show you his love and compassion. For the Lord is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for his help. Isaiah 30:18

Throughout my time in Africa I have hoped and prayed that God would do so much. I wanted to see the lame walk, the hungry be fed, the abused set free, and entire communities to receive hope. I go everyday to the squatter camp and do anything I can to help at the carepoint there to create a safe and healthy place for children to come, learn, eat, play, and be loved. All this sounds wonderful but sometimes it is hard because Kristin and I go everyday and many times we do not see the results of our labors. Children still go home to bad situations, people still go across the street to the dump because they are hungry, and the lame are still not walking.

I started to get frustrated. I prayed, "God, I have confidence that you are with me and want me to be here in Swaziland. Why aren't you showing up in mighty ways? Why haven't we seen you move? You say you are a consuming fire. Why are you not consuming this place?" The Holy Spirit then reminded me of a scripture that I hadn't thought of in a while. He spoke to me from Isaiah 40:31, "Just wait on me and I will renew your strength. You will sore on wings like eagles." I felt he was just telling me to wait. To wait in faith that he is there and will work. It's just a matter of his timing. I started to look up scriptures that talked about waiting on the Lord and realized that the Bible is full of this concept. From testimonies to desperate cries, there are so many who have found that it is essential to wait upon the Lord. We are even instructed to wait in eager expectation for the Lord.

So this is what I am doing - or at least trying to do. I am waiting on the Lord in his wisdom and justice to come to the rescue of this community that I have grown to love so much. And I trust he will.

Since doing that he has opened up doors to meet needs in real ways. One day last week there were a lot of kids missing from the carepoint. We were told that they had all gone across the street to the city dump because a truck had coming bringing expired meat. The children never get meat so to them this was a real treat. We were appalled however that children were sorting through waste to get expired meat. We knew we couldn't solve this problem, but we desperately wanted to do something. We figured, Jesus had massive feedings (from five loaves and two fish) so why can't we. Kristin and I went to the store with our leader, Kate, and bought enough bread, cheese, meat, chips, oranges, and candy to feed 400 people. A small number campared to Jesus' 5000 but it was a start. Our entire team then worked to make these sack lunches and then piled in the van and went to the squatter camp.

When we got there, we just went around the community gathering children and brought them up to the carepoint. We played with them and sang songs. Then we were able to share the gospel through a translator and helped them make small crosses out of popsicle sticks. I don't know if anyone believed that day but I do know that God promises that his word will never go out and return void. Then we started to hand out the food. The kids were excited and were able to take some home to their families. We then started to walk around handing out the food. Some took lunches to the dump for the men who are there everyday trying to find something to live off of. It was such an amazing then to bless the people in that way. They were so thankful for the food. I told some men who were especially greatful that I was doing this because Jesus loves them and wants them to have enough to eat. I love Jesus and want to love the people he loves. The man rejoiced with me and replied, "I too love Jesus. Yes, I love him too much!"

Hello everyone. Thank you for all the comments I have been getting lately. It is so encouraging to see how Swaziland is impacting so many people. This small kingdom has changed my heart and it seems to be doing the same to many back home. Praise God.

This past week my team was challenged with the question, "What would someone in your circumstances do if they were absolutely confident that God was with them?" I have known since I was little that God is with me and he will never leave me but I realized that so many times I do not live like it. I pray safe prayers and try not to challenge too much. How would I live if I was confident, not just had the knowledge, but was confident that God is with me everywhere I go and in everything I do? What about you? Living in the states, would you be living any differently? It's something definitely worth thinking about and praying through.

I don't have very much to post today but I do have some important things I need the church to be praying for. Some of the textile factories in Swaziland have not been paying their workers and so the workers went on strike. The factories then just fired them all saying they could get anyone to work there. The public transportation workers, which are the backbone of Swaziland considering everyone here takes public, went on strike for the textile workers and started to riot. It only lasted one day and then they went back to work saying that if the demands weren't met by the 28^th they would strike and riot again. Everyone I talk to says if it comes to that it will be worse this time. My team and I have been safe and will continue to be careful. None of us will be going into town on Friday just to be safe. Please pray for this small restless nation. Many people are angry with the government and for good reason. It is so corrupt and the people are realizing it. Pray that agreements will be met without violence and that there might be both progress and peace. Pray that God might use these events to move this country to him in a powerful way. Thank you so much.

Hello everyone. I am trying to get back to posting every Monday now but it was good to see how many people read Friday's post about Moses so hopefully this won't be too confusing.

This past week has been good to be back in Swaziland after our prayer retreat in South Africa. We got some good rest and enjoyed some powerful worship but it's nice to be home. Kristin and I have stopped going to Pastor Sambo's church and instead are focusing more of our time at the Carepoint. This week we have helped cook, continued with the Bible Study, played with the kids, and done our best to encourage the workers and missionaries there.

There is a 10 year old girl at the carepoint named Nobile (yes, that name does have a click in it) who loves to practice her English and helps out with the younger kids. On Friday though, she started to complain of stomach pains and said she was suffering. She asked the teacher to do something for her, asked me to do something, and asked me to make the teacher do something, but neither one of us had anything to give her. My first aid kit consists of a Ziploc filled with band-aids, Neosporin, and cotton balls.

So I told her, "I don't have anything to give you but I can pray for you." She thanked me and sat down. I put a hand on her and simply prayed that God would take away the pain so that she could play and learn.

After I was done she turned to the teacher and said something in SiSwati. The teacher then told me, "God has tested your anointing." I was confused but she explained, "Nobile said that the pain is gone and she said, ‘God is alive!'"

I was blown away and all I could say was "Praise Him!" I am so thankful that God showed himself to be real and powerful to all of us that day. It shows that God is listening to our prayers and cares about us. Thank you Jesus!